tomorrow will be a better day

i cried during dinner. in the public somemore! throw face throw face.. but i couldnt control at that point of time. it might also be because of the recent incident, where people think that only their lives are imperfect, only their families are incomplete and they only think about themselves. they didnt think that they are not the only ones with incomplete and unhappy family. which set me thinking, because i suddenly realized.. i kind of lost the memory and impression of when my father was still around. it's been 5 years and i thought i was always cool about it but deep down, nobody knows i actually still think of him. which is why i feel sad, because i dont have much memory of how it was like in the past. i also started thinking about my mother, why couldnt i be better. i could have done a better job, she too. who doesnt want to be loved by our mother? i may seem ok, i may look nonchalant, i may say i dont need them but, is that really what i want?

some people really dont deserve to be loved. but i cant be bothered by such people because once bitten twice shy. but for me, once bitten not shy until now twice bitten then start to regret. it goes to show that it is really not worth it at all for some people. but i keep reminding myself, not to hold grudges. it is their lives, their character, in their blood. if they are meant to be this way, then i shall leave them to be. in the end, if they regret in future, it is none of my business anymore. i cant be bothered to care about people who dont appreciate and cherish my feelings. so why should i waste them?

work is getting busy, which i like very much. august is going to be a happy month because there are 2 great weeks! this & next. this week because of our plans during the weekend, i will finally be spending a lot of time with monster darling. and next week because it is going to be a short week due to monday's public holiday in lieu! monster darling is bringing me to the movies on sunday together with his buddies. :D we are going to watch UP 3D! yay! we are going to have the 3D specs and watch the characters come out of the screen! :D im so excited. looking forward to weekends!